It was really hot last week so I set a bucket of water in the front yard, gave her some measuring cups and toy boats, and let her have at it. Except she has this thing about drinking water from places she shouldn't (mud puddles, the swimming pool, bathwater, the toilet that one time - that we know of, dishwater) so I had to tell her over and over to STOP DRINKING THE WATER YOU JUST DUNKED YOUR SHOES IN. NO IT'S NOT OKAY, NOT EVEN IF YOU PUT IT IN A CUP FIRST.
Me: Piper, if you drink any more of that water, we are going inside.
Piper: You're not supposed to drink the water, it's just pretend.
Me: No, not even pretend. Not this time. You clearly cannot handle even pretend-drinking this water, even though it's got dead bugs and grass clippings in it.
Piper: This water is gross. Don't drink it.
Me: That's right.
Piper: Hey Mom, turn around!
Me (thinking we are playing some fun new game and desperate to distract from the water-drinking): Okay! I'm turned around!
Me: Piper, if you drink any more of that water, we are going inside.
Piper: You're not supposed to drink the water, it's just pretend.
Me: No, not even pretend. Not this time. You clearly cannot handle even pretend-drinking this water, even though it's got dead bugs and grass clippings in it.
Piper: This water is gross. Don't drink it.
Me: That's right.
Piper: Hey Mom, turn around!
Me (thinking we are playing some fun new game and desperate to distract from the water-drinking): Okay! I'm turned around!
(slurping sound behind my back)
Me (turning back around): Piper, did you drink that water?!
Piper (giggling): Hey Mom, turn around again!
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