Oh, Hell No

Sorry Anthropologie, but even you cannot convince me that pleated khaki shorts are cool.

Some Stuff About and For Mother's Day

We don't celebrate Mothers' Day around here much, for a variety of reasons. It was never a huge deal to me in the first place, and this year it will be the anniversary of Chick's death, which isn't the happiest of associations. I have some ideological problems with its evolution from Julia Ward Howe's pleas for peace to the hyper-commercialized backhanded compliment of its current incarnation, with plenty of stops for misogyny and trivialization along the way. Aside: Did y'all see this episode of The Middle? I laughed so hard I thought I was going to require an oxygen tank.

Anyway.

Our finances are usually tight enough that my pathological aversion to spending money on myself kicks in and outlaws whatever gesture my husband proposes despite my ideological objections. If he presses, I always tell him that I don't need trinkets or slippers or candy; I'd much rather have a home project completed (like, uhh, the pile of framed pictures that have been sitting around NOT on the wall, for three months and counting) or an afternoon to work ALONE in the house.  Getting a pile of crap off the floor and up onto the shelves and walls where it belongs or having time to finish a whole paragraph is way more valuable to me than stuff.  Although if he wanted to bring me back a jumbo-size caramel latte, I wouldn't say no.

BUT.

If someone did ask me, "What do you want for Mother's Day?" and I were inclined to answer something other than "someone to do the mountain of laundry currently creating a fire hazard in the hallway," this would be my list.

1. Eames House Blocks from House Industries (found via Handmade Charlotte):  Look at these, would you?

So gorgeous. No, I would not let my daughter play with them. They are $150 per set (of 36; 20 for the house, 16 for the studio) and besides, they are MINE.

2. A screenprinting machine. After seeing Kathleen's awesome "What the FRAK" shirt in this post (that's a Battlestar Galactica reference, for those of you who are not as nerdy as me), I decided immediately that I must have one. Must. Have. One. So that I may fill our house with screen-printed items which pay tribute to all our favorite things (no, not Beets-Bears-Battlestar Galactica, but close). My first project would be making Piper a "Nugget" shirt (that's another BSG reference, my nerdiness knows no bounds).

3. This "Consomme Cap" from Anthropologie:

It's so cute. But $48 for something which I will wear a lot but will also get stuffed in my bag, sweated on profusely, and occasionally wind up on the floor of my closet...maybe I'll try making one someday.

4. Landscapers. Seriously. Our side-yard is entirely (no, REALLY) covered in dandelions so big I suspect our house may have been built on a nuclear waste dump. Our entire front yard is clover. I have spent many hot, cranky hours out there already, ripping and digging and pushing my weed-pulling tools to the limits of their strength, and it doesn't look any better. I just want someone to come fix it, because I am at a loss. Oh, and can they put up a privacy fence while they're out there? I am tired of kids stealing Piper's toys out of our yard and playing on our swings.

5. This "Necktie Tote," also from Anthropologie:

Mmmmmm. It comes in blue, too, and I can't quite decide which I like best:

Probably the green, I suppose. I already have a wicked awesome blue-and-yellow bag a friend bought me for Christmas one year (it was, um, also from Anthro. I think I have a leeetle problem).

6. A gift certificate to Sew, Mama, Sew! or Repro Depot or Crafty Planet so I can stock up on nice fabrics and those Oliver + S patterns I am itching to make for all the kids in my orbit.

7. Some Mama jewelry. Sure, it's a little hokey, but so what? If motherhood doesn't give me the right to indulge my shamelessly-sentimental side, what does? I like the Odette Alfaro stuff (giveaway here), Hipmom, Cinnamon Sticks, and Turtle Love Co.

8.Sheer Jersey Scarf by Zen Threads, gray/white stripe with bike print.  I make a little EEEEEEEEEE noise every time I see it:

9. One of the Gossamer Scarves from Uniform Natural - everyone raves about them, and I've made myself a couple of gauze scarves, but these seem so much nicer. I'd like to see what all the fuss is about.

10. Some TOMS shoes. I am curious, the shoes are cute, and they are, by all accounts, a terrific company.  I really like the Boaobab Sunset Linen Classics:

 But the Silver Glitters are also pretty sweet (gold, too). And I find the Vegan Wrap Boots fascinating.

So that's my imaginary list. Hope everyone's weekends - and Mother's Day - goes off without a hitch!

Friday Fashion: Insert Clever Title About Cowls Here

Seriously, go ahead. I tried all manner of puns on the word "cowl," and they all made me groan.

I used to hate cowls.  I thought they were silly; why not just wear a scarf, for crying out loud?  Then at least you wouldn't have to yank it over your head to get it off.

This was before the first time I accidentally dipped the end of one of my long, skinny scarves into a public toilet.  Oh, yes, I say the first time.  I am a slow learner.

What with all the snow and unreasonably-cold-for-the-south temperatures around here this winter, I have become an even bigger scarf addict.  This has created a few logistical problems (see sentence above re: public toilets and then picture that going on while screaming at your 2.5-year-old to stop poking her hands in the 'sanitary napkin disposal' box).  I have decided that perhaps cowls aren't so silly after all.  

If you knit (or can bribe a knitter into making you one), here's a lovely cashmere one by Isabelle at The Purl Bee.

Or you can just buy someone else's handmade stuff - Vicki has a nice variety.

If you want more of an all-seasons thing, try a Necklush.  Or make your own*.  I would like to do this, as I have about 576 sad, stretched-out and holey t-shirts which I should stop wearing and which would find newer, prettier lives hanging around my neck rather than keeping vanilla latte out of my cleavage. Although I suppose they could still do that, just in a more stylish way.  You know, a way that allows me to appear in public without looking like I just rolled out of bed.

*I will tell you that the Cut Out + Keep website made Firefox crash on me three times, so be warned.  The very best Necklush tutorial used to be found at This Old Dress, but Connie had to remove it for legal reasons.  You should go check out her blog anyway, because it's awesome.  She does things with t-shirts that leave me in awe.

Friday Fashion: Your Mama Dresses You Funny

Am I the only one out there who thinks it's fun to dress your kids in old clothes? Part of the fun of having a kid has been to dress her like a baby of 50 or even 100 years ago. Example number one:
Piper, quite pleased with herself at about nine months old.

The dress was mine when I was a baby; the bonnet I made (I love bonnets, for both boys and girls); the shoes I found on clearance somewhere; the legwarmers are of course Babylegs.

A friend of mine said "she looks like a 1950's baby" when I showed up for lunch with Piper dressed like this.

To that end, meet Belle Heir. Authentic vintage childrens' clothing. It's marvelous. The outerwear section alone makes me squee. And their prices don't seem out of this world, unlike a lot of "vintage" or "retro" children's clothing places. 

Friday Fashion: Yummy Shoes.

Looking for perfection? Here it is:


I want a pair of these. I want them so much I feel like I shall explode. I want them in every color, to go with every skirt I own. Okay, I am drooling now, so I'll stop.

Friday Fashion: Queen Bee/Chickpea Bags

It is well-documented that I am a total bag FREAK. I have more purses, bags, backpacks, totes, and satchels than any sane person could possibly use in a lifetime. And yet, there's always room for more.

Meet Queen Bee & Chickpea Bags.

Queen Bee is for grown-ups - bags, wallets, & bike panniers. Chickpea is their line of baby bags and accessories. Both are very cute. All the stuff is hand made at their studio in Portland, OR.

I actually have two of their bags; a trucker bag in a now-discontinued leaf pattern and a "laptop jetpack" (a discontinued style) in a lotus pattern. I love them both. I had really, really wanted one of their diaper bags when Piper was little, but I couldn't justify spending the money. By the time an awesome sale came around at the same time my husband wanted to know what I'd like for an anniversary gift, she was out of diapers and so I had to settle for the trucker-style bag. My laptop bag only rarely gets used for laptop transport; it has d-rings and convertible straps on the back so it can be a backpack or two styles of shoulder bag. This made it my main bag for much of last summer, when I was taking commuter-train trips downtown once a week with Piper to pick up our CSA box and then we'd spend the afternoon wandering downtown, going to the library and playing in the fountain. My Queen Bee jetpack was the only one of my many bags that was light enough to carry all afternoon, big enough to hold snacks, drinks, swimsuit, towel, change of clothes, and small toys, and versatile enough to keep up with our activities. I love that thing. And someday, when I have a shiny new laptop, I will actually use it to carry a computer around.

However, what I'm really lusting after right now is an Edith:


It comes in large and small versions.

I love them both, although I like the proportionate look of the small one better. I'd probably need the large one, though, because for some reason I seem to need to carry a massive amount of crap around with me these days. Either way, I wouldn't say no!

Friday Fashion: Down East Basics

I commented to my sister (and to you guys) one day that I might be too old for Delia's. They don't have much of the stuff that I used to buy from them - cargo pants, cheap basic tees, cute skirts. It's a teeny-bopper site, and sells teeny-bopper clothes, which are just not my thing anymore. I'm not really in the market for skintight fuschia skinny-jeans and faux-vintage cartoon graphic tees. Their thermals used to be a staple of my winter wardrobe, but as they are now tissue-thin, a foot too long for me, and I'd be paying $22.50 each for something that will snag the first time I wear it and develop holes with its first wash, I pass.

But I was still in the market for a new basic-stuff/pretend-shopping site. I had given up hope of doing anything but mournfully coveting things from Anthropologie...and then I met Down East Basics.

Not only do they have an entire page of nice basic tees & tanks, their other stuff is cute too. These skirts are a lot closer to the stuff I wear nowadays than, say, a zebra-print velour bubble-style ultra-mini skirt. In fact, a couple of them look a lot like ones I was coveting from Anthropologie, and a couple more look like stuff I've already got hanging in my closet. They have a girls' section, too, although a lot of it is a bit floral and pink for my taste. Their mens' section is a little sparse, but does have some nice basic tees.

And it all seems very affordable. Their sale section has some mad awesome bargains, but the regular prices aren't sky-high. They've recently added a lot of nice handbags at very reasonable prices, like this Large Patent Tote for $24.99 (which I like almost as much as this Hollywood Intuition bag I've been drooling over). The recent cold weather has me eyeing the Carpe Diem Cardigan ($26.99) because I am a sucker for a good slouchy cardigan. I can't help that it would look great with the First Lady Skirt ($34.99) and a kick-ass pair of boots...

Friday Fashion: Shoes From Delia's

I love Delia's, although I feel a bit old shopping there these days. It's a website/catalog/store aimed at teens and 'tweens, which I am definitely not. But I've bought and worn their stuff since I actually was part of their target market, so I guess that just makes me a loyal customer, not ridiculous.

I think I have aged out of much of their offerings - I am not really in the market for Paul Frank bikinis, novelty t-shirts, or prom dresses - I'm never to old to shop for shoes.

Take, for example, these lovely things, the "Keds Dallas Wedge."
I have found myself loving yellow in the past year or so, and these hit all the right spots. They look like just the right mix of comfy and flirty and durable. Oh, and affordable, since they're on clearance for $29.99

There's a wide variety of Converse, including these beauties:
I love these "Converse Tweed Oxfords" very much (although I think that's a herringbone not a tweed but whatever), but I do not love the $55.50 asking price.

Side note: When did Converse get to be so expensive?! My favorite shoes are a pair of suede One-Stars that I have nearly loved to death and searching for a replacement has given me serious sticker shock. Right now, it appears I will have to replace my $15 super-comfy and awesomely-fitting originals with $70 shoddily-constructed ones that don't fit the same. I loved these shoes for the way the cradled my super-narrow feet, and all the ones I can find now have me feeling like I've just put on flippers. Anyway, back to the eye-candy:

These "Regal Boots" may be the answer to my quest for the perfect brown boot. Of course, there's also these, which may satisfy my totally inexplicable craving for a pair of cowboy-ish boots:

"Dingo Harness Leather Boot," $109.50. Similar, and also lovely:

"Blowfish Tough Stuff Suede Boot," on clearance for $79.50. Really, I think these have it all: a little bit Western with the saddle-yoke on the front, a little bit rock n' roll with the buckles, and a lot practical with the height, so that you don't freeze your legs off or get snow in your shoes.

I'm going to shut up now, because this post is long enough and I could talk about shoes all day.

Friday Fashion: Little Feet

I love Livie and Luca shoes. I have not yet bought a pair for Piper, but that has not stopped me from obsessing about them. I daydream about buying her these in every size:


Ahhhhh! Couldn't you just have a heart attack from all the cute?! These are pretty good, too:


And would get a lot of use, considering that half her wardrobe is purple.

However, at $47 a pair, for something that she would scuff in two seconds flat, these will have to remain on my wishlist, for now at least.

Friday Fashion Ramblings: What I Mean by "Less"

I am a many-times-confessed Bag Addict. I like to look at Purse Blog and drool over all the fabulous bags. Perfectly innocent.

But this is what they consider "getting the look for less":

I guess some people would consider that "less," but $268 is still way outta my price range, you know? Especially when I can get this at Old Navy for $24.50:



Is it real leather? No. Does it have a designer label on it? No. But unless somebody is looking really hard at it (and I always have to wonder who does that?), all they will see is me with my sweet-looking handbag.

The truth is, I would feel MORE confident carrying around my $25 handbag than I would a $268 one. Yes, the $268 one is swanky - and the $1595 one is even more so - with lining and real leather and probably some hand-stitched something somewhere, but these very pricey handbags have very specific care instructions. They need to be conditioned and kept stuffed full of paper to retain their shape and cleaned very carefully, et cetera. I would feel so nervous carrying that thing around in my klutzy arms as I navigate my very messy life. Whereas my $25 bag can probably withstand a few knocks and bumps. I can cram it full of snacks, spare clothes, sippy cups of chocolate milk, toys, notepads, knitting projects, and all the other 10,000 things I have to carry around on a daily basis, and not worry that it will get stretched out of shape. If that sippy cup should leak, I can just empty the bag, hose it out with my kitchen-sink sprayer, and hang it up to dry.

Don't get me wrong, it would be nice to have the opportunity to spend hundreds (or thousands) on a handbag, but, for now anyway, I don't pine for anything I would ruin in two hours.

My Favorite Things, #2: The Crazy Boots

My sister bought these for me back in August, for my birthday, and I didn't think I'd ever wear them. They seemed a little too UGG-like for my taste, and they would probably be useless against rain or snow. I couldn't figure out where they would fit in.

Fast-forward a few months, and I'm looking for something comfy to slip on with my layers of skirts and legwarmers when we're about to go out to dinner. These happened to match perfectly with the brown skirt and blue shirt I'd pulled from the "probably clean" pile at the bottom of my closet. They were fast to put on, they were comfy, my feet were not freezing like they had been in my other pull-on boots the day before. Just like that, these little boots moved up from "what the heck?" status to "how did I live without you?" ranking.

On closer inspecton, I think the buckles keep them from looking too house-slipper-y, like a lot of cloth boots I see. My husband thought I looked "cute" in all my layers of scarves and skirts and legwarmers and hoodies; I just hoped I didn't look like a bag lady.

Psst: For Thing #1, see this post.

Friday Fashion Ramblings: What Other Me Would Wear

It was so fun to play pretend-dress-up last week, I thought I'd do it again.

I like to think of this ruffly navy number as something Other Me would wear. With a great big white handbag and a really simple necklace.

Other Me is someone I invented last weekend, while I was shopping with a friend in a store that catered to six-foot women who don't mind showing a bit of...well, everything. All the clothes were ones that would look good on a really slutty supermodel. They were dirt-cheap (both in price and in quality) and not really my style. For some reason, I fell in love with a pair of really inappropriate-for-me shoes (let's put it this way: they would've been totally at home on a dominatrix, whereas I trip over my own feet even in sneakers) and my friend looked at me like I was nuts.

"They're not for me," I said. "They're for Other Me. You know, the me that isn't married and isn't chasing a two-year-old around," I panted as I dashed around the store trying to prevent Piper from leaving with merchandise or knocking anything over. "The me that's a famous writer or fashion-magazine editor and lives in the imaginary New York City of the movies, where everybody wanders around dressed in $500 shoes and you can always afford a cab if you don't feel like walking."

Her eyes lit up. "Aaaaahhh," she said. "I gotcha."